I always say a good bedtime routine is conducive to good sleep. We must create a “Sleep Sanctuary” to help children sleep well; starting a ritual with them every night in their bedroom allows them to enjoy a better sleep quality while being relaxed and happy. Sleep experts also recommend creating a sleep sanctuary for adults to solve sleep issues and insomnia.

Why have a sleep routine, and how do you maintain a good one?

It all begins with sleep biology and the reason behind acquiring a relaxing sleep routine early in the night. Melatonin, the sleep hormone, is produced by our brains around sunset (triggered by darkness) and builds up in our bodies between 7-8 pm.

Hence, this is the perfect time for children to go to bed as the hormone levels are elevated, making it easier to fall asleep. Creating a relaxing routine that includes dim light will help melatonin accumulate and prepare them to fall asleep and sustain sleep.

Babies start to experience separation anxiety as early as eight months. It is essential to have a bedtime routine where we spend at least the last 30 minutes with them before bedtime, in their room, giving them our undivided attention (without screens, mobiles, and distractions) while reading stories, talking to them, and bonding with them. This will ease separation anxiety, helping them go to sleep relaxed and happy.

The child’s bedroom has to be calm and relaxing. A bedroom containing so many colors and vibrant patterns will generally stimulate them and might even overstimulate a newborn. Choosing warm, calm colors and designs for the room and dim yellow, red, or green light (blue and white light reduce melatonin levels), will be perfect for good sleep.

How to create a good bedtime routine:

First, always start your child’s bedtime routine with a shower, or if you don’t want to shower every day, you can replace that with a quick wash or a dry bath. Why? Because it is very relaxing! Think about how you feel after a shower or washing your face. 

Second, feed your baby, and a critical note here is to ensure your baby has a “full feed” to sleep longer. When feeding your baby, make sure they do not fall asleep, resulting in a baby not completing their feed. This will interrupt their sleep later in the night to complete the feed. Taking a full feed at bedtime will make them sleep long hours. A baby will only wake up when they are hungry again.  

After the feed, as a last step of the routine, you move to the quality time phase with your baby, which includes dim lights. In this phase, you read a story, complete a quiet activity, talk to your child, listen to soft music, pray with them, or any other thing you chose to do to bond with your baby or child. At this phase, your child will have your full attention without distractions; that’s where you can shower them with kisses and hugs and all the love you have. This routine step is essential because this is how you ensure they enjoy sleep, look forward to the sleep routine, and link sleep to a positive experience. This is a positive association you create with your child to decrease separation anxiety at the baby stage and then bedtime battles as a toddler and preschooler. 

After completing all the steps mentioned earlier, you should switch the lights off, and the child goes to sleep. Preferably independently, of course, as independent sleep and having good sleep skills will help them sleep through the night.

Having said all the above, it’s essential to acknowledge how challenging it can be to start your child on a sleep routine, especially for moms who do not have much structure and routine in their day because of their work or because of the Covid life nowadays.

However, no matter the circumstances or house dynamics, I highly recommend that you prioritize your child’s sleep and sleep routines. It will most probably save your time and energy going through sleep battles and gives you more quality and bonding time with your child.